I can literally feel myself becoming a bad person.
Everyday, it gets worse. I'll think or do or say something and at the time won't think anything of it, that's probably the worst part, because a few hours or minutes later, it'll come crashing down on me the weight of what's been done.
I hate this about myself more than I can possibly say. I hate myself. I really, truly hate myself and what it is my friends make me do. I get along better with people I hardly know. You know how people say "I'm a nice person once you get to know me." Well, I'm the opposite.
God, I hate this.
Being bullied has well and truly screwed me up. I can't seem to say anything nice anymore, and it kills me.
I have a list of ways to improve myself:
♥ Be non-judgmental
♦ Keep opinions to myself
♣ Stop talking so much
♠ Know when to leave well enough alone
♥ Earn my confidence
♦ Work harder in school
♣ Revise more at home
♠ Don't over think things
♥ STOP BEING A BITCH
It's a working progress. I hate all of these things about myself and I know I can be a better person, if I really try.
That's all for now folks :)
Emily xx
PS. That deal I made with that guy? He supposedly took drugs for the first time! There's no way that's true but I don't mind :D Oh, and he told me a secret about his best friend... is that a good thing? Especially seeing as said best friend told me a secret about deal guy a couple of years ago which has been at the back of my mind for a while...?
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